I knew there was a reason I don’t drink!!! Fuck!!! Three vodka/cranberries and 2 glasses of champagne and I puked 3 times! Then again, I didn’t eat anything but 4 pieces of sushi yesterday… A little food probably would’ve saved me! lol.

Anyway, me, Lynda and Ivy partied at My House in Hollywood last night at the Beverly Hills Royalty party with a bunch of friends, SEXY bitches, dudes in funny costumes, and enjoyed performances by Shifty (lead singer of the band Crazytown and from Vh1′s Celebrity Rehab, also an old friend of mine that I hadn’t seen in a year or so!) and Mickey Avalon (who I had never met before but he was super nice and put on a pretty good show).

As I’m laying in bed now, recovering, I thought I’d post the few pictures that we snapped with our cells phones…

(Oh, and I’m gonna try to make them clickable links this time so you can see a larger pic. Let’s hope it works!)

Lynda as a sailor, me as a pirate, and Ivy as Madusa... Getting ready to head out...

Free bottle of champagne!!! (I handed the bottle off after 2 glasses... I couldn't hang anymore! lol.)

With one of Ivy's sexy girlfriends. (I forgot her name!!!!)

Me and my girlies!!!!!!!!!!!

Me and Lynda with Mickey Avalon after he performed.

Waiting for our car in valet... I have no idea what we're doing!!!!

Laughing??? About to vomit??? Who knows.... Hahahahahahah!!!

In the elevator back at Lynda and Ivy's place... Apparently I couldn't even stand up at this point! lol.

Don't drink & drive!!! I slept at their place and mommy Lynda took care of me!!! Notice the trash can. It came in handy... Twice!!!

It was definitely a good night! It’s almost November and I can honestly say that I’ve only been drunk three times this year: My birthday in February, UFC in Montreal in April, and last night! I’m not a huge fan of drinking and the spinning in my head right now is reminding me why… UGH!!!

Now… If only I can get it to stop so I can get through my meeting at 4:00 today… FUCK!

So…. What has little miss Jayden been up to latey????

Hmmmmm….

Well, shooting porn! Duh! Hahahahaha!!!! I actually did a feature dance show in my home town last weekend!!!!!! It was so much fun!!!!!!

I actually do not belong to an agency that books feature dancing, so I NEVER do it. The last time I did it before this show was, funny, exactly one year ago, to the day! Well, my sister works at a strip club in the neighborhood that we grew up in, and after dropping my name a time or two, they club management asked if she could do them a favor and try to get me in to dance. There was so way I was going to pass up the opportunity to visit my old town, see some old friends, etc. Well, soon after they booked me for one night, a local adult novelty store had heard the news and asked if I could do an in-store signing that same day.  FUN!!!!!!!!!

So, to make a long story short, I had the signing at the ‘Toy Box’ in Upland, CA from noon until 2pm, then my feature dance show at 10:00 until 2am at Flesh Showgirls in San Bernardino, CA. In between the two event, Ivan (who was my roadie for the day) and I had to kill some time. We ended up meeting up with my parents, my brother, my sister and her son for linner (you know, the meal between Lunch and dINNER. lol) at the Cheesecake Factory in Rancho Cucamonga. Then, to pass MORE time, we strolled across the street to tour around the Bass Pro Shop since Ivan had never been to one before (I swear… Disneyland for MEN!). Here are a few pics from throughout the day/night:

Outside the 'Toy Box' in Upland... I think this was AFTER the signing... HAD to take a pic!

With the employees of the 'Toy Box'. There were all soooooooo great!!!! And the store is HUGE!!!!!!!!

Getting attacked by a bobcat as Ivan just stood there to take pics! (Those Bass Pro Shop stores are CRAZY!!!)

We each paid 50cents to shoot at Targets... Ivan creamed me!!!! My score was 16, I think... Ivan went above and beyond 120! LMAO!!!

We saw this as we pulled up to Flesh... NICE!!!!!!!!!!! I'd be crazy not to take a picture with that!!!

In my dressing room, after my first stage appearance. That's my sis taking the pic, and Ivan on the phone!

Ivan is one of my closest friends… Aside from him shooting my dirty porn for my site, he’s like a brother to me! We get along great and, after spending almost 17 straight hours together that day and not killing each other… Hey, that’s pretty good! And, to top it off, my entire family found him (and his magician friend who also joined us) very entertaining… As Ivan thought my family was CRAZY! lol. Hey, I warned him… We’re different! lol. We’re definitely loud and very open and blunt! We’re just fun, non-judgmental people! Overall… Linner was fun, and the entire day went GREAT!!!

Now that I got that show out of the way… I’m in the process of signing up with a feature dance agency in order to get around the country and come visit EVERYONE!!!!!!!!! Hopefully all goes smoothly and I can start soon!

On another note… I was feeling a bit stressed this weekend and at about 2pm on Saturday, I texted my mom: “I’m coming up there.” I grabbed my toothbrush and my dog and I left. Seriously! Didn’t pack or anything! lol. (Yeah… It was one of THOSE days!) Well, I had planned on spending the evening and all day Sunday in the Mom’s-Home-Cooking-Food-Coma, but it turns out that my parents’ house was being used to shoot a Doritos commercial, so we had to be out for the day! Ugh! But, as soon as the director got there, he said that one of the girls flaked and asked if I’d like to fill in… Umm?!?!?! YES!!!!!!!!! So, I did… We shot from about 11am until 5:30pm. I can’t say much about it, but it was a great little skit! And, IF (?) is airs, it’ll be a few months. Hmmm… Guess I’ll keep a lookout!

Before saying yes to doing the commercial, my little brother (who’s 12) asked me if we could do something fun together (they live 100 miles from me so I rarely see him!). We had decided to try bowling since we both SUCK at it, but then I had to cancel to do the commercial. Well, throughout the day, he’s pop in and ask me, “How much longer?” “Do you still want to go bowling later?” Things like that. Then, the second we wrapped, he was at it again: “Are you ready?” I grabbed a couple carrot sticks, throw on some jeans and hit the local bowling alley! I was starving at that point because I hadn’t eaten all day, so we ordered some pizza (seriously, it’s pretty good at that place!). We bowled 3 games, I won the first and the third… Neither of us topped a score in the 80s! (See… We SUCK!) I ended up taking off at about 9:00, and PASSING OUT as soon as I got home! I was so tired!

Today’s been okay, I guess. I shot a GREAT scene for Brazzers, but I started to feel really sick towards the end of the day! I had a really dry cough and was just HOT! I felt like a 50 year old woman having hot flashes! It was BAD!!! But, got through the scene and it’s a great plot!

I’ve got a HUGE Halloween party to attend on Thursday and I’m so excited about it! It’s the Beverly Hills Royalty Pimps ‘n Hos party, being thrown by some friends of mine so, of course, I’m HOOKED UP for the night!!! Unfortunately, I’ll be rollin’ solo… Well, just dateless… I’ve got my girls!!!!!!!!!!

Well, if I’m gonna touch on the ‘date’ subject… Let me explain! Oh, this one’s FUN!

So, I ask this guy that I’ve been talking to for a few months now if he’d go with me. He accepts the invitation. Yay! Date for Jayden! Well, this was about a month ago while he was out of town. He gets back a couple weeks later and I never hear from him again. Thinking maybe he needed some time to relax and enjoy being home for a minute, I didn’t make a big fuss. As the party gets closer and closer and my friends are trying to finalize plans and everything, I send him a few texts in a matter of about 7 days asking him to call me so we could figure everything out. He never does. Okay, I’m PISSED!!!!!!!!!!! What kind of douchebag says he’ll attend a big party with you, then just ignores you?!?!?!? WOW!!!! Fed up, I sent an email today. I went off! And, typical of a female, it wasn’t just about the party! lol.

Here’s the backstory on that: Dude’s got a kid… Not a baby, a teenager… So, when we first starting ‘talking’, I thought that was cool cuz it’s been long enough so there shouldn’t be much ‘baby mama drama’. Umm… Maybe… But then, after the guy being away 80 percent of the time and being unusually quiet when he was home, I questioned it. It was bad enough that the guy was always across the country so all I mainly had a relationship with the phone, but I didn’t get to see him when he was home cuz he was ‘too busy’. (I could see that… He didn’t get to where he is now by not working hard!) Anyway, during a little Vegas getaway together, I questioned his ‘situation’. Turns out baby’s mama lives with him… But they’re “not together and haven’t been in a long time”… Just want to give the kid a “childhood that’s as normal as possible”. Mood-killer, but I could live! So, home, then away, home, then away… nudie pictures, kinky texts, naked iChat, etc… I LIKE this guy! He’s smart, funny, and just a good guy. Definitely someone that I want something serious with! So, I invite him to the party and get ignored…

So the email was about the weirdness and basically how I thought I was being lied to about the baby-mama situation and I was just fed up and irritated and that he was being a douche by not acknowledging it. You bet I got an email back from that one! (That could’ve been the part about me dropping names in this particular blog! LMAO! Believe me… I’d be the one to make sure baby-mama knew what was up! I’m crazy like that… If you piss me off, of course!) So, to sum up the emails: He and baby-mama are trying to ‘work things out’ (apparently the last 13+ years hasn’t been enough time to figure it out!); He wants what’s best for his daughter (i.e., her mother!); He’s sorry if he was misleading (right! Because even casual friend exchange pictures of their crotch and iBone!); He really loves hanging out and talking to me (so much that he ignored me for over a week!); And he’d like to still ‘hang out and talk’ (Ummm… Isn’t that what I’ve been trying to do all this time?!?!).

Honestly, I can’t believe this guy! First of all, I don’t think you have the right to call yourself a man if you can’t be upfront with a girl in a situation like this. I mean, was he just gonna completely stand me up for this party? Or try to continue our little ‘thing’ and not inform me on his home situation? Or what? It fucking pisses me off! I know that everyone lies and whatnot… But I REALLY LIKED THIS GUY… And that’s what makes it worse! It’s not like I just met him, “Oh, I’m married”… “Oh well, she’ll never know about a one night stand!” No, this guy strung me along for 6 months then had to nerve to apologize in case he had been ‘misleading’, but still wants to talk… WTF?!?!?! HHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL NO! What he did was a complete douchebag thing (yeah, I like the ‘D’ word!) and it’s not fair to me. The end. (Being that I’m a girl and we’re dumb in this department… If the guy were to turn up COMPLETELY SINGLE at some point, I’d lock his ass down! [I know, I know... but he's a good catch... and feelings don't go away that quick! lol])

So that’s why I’m rollin’ single to the Halloween party! Me, my girls, our friends, and the Goose… Oh, and I might invite MaryJane! lol! Hey, can’t a girl party when she’s feeling a bit down?!?! Hahahahahaha!

Anyway, I think this entry is long enough… And I’m getting tired! Have a good evening everyone… And HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I had a slightly rough day on set today and thought I’d make light of the situation by making fun of mine and my costar Abbey Brooks’ diva-like attitude by posting a few random little thoughts on Twitter about how we were having a long day and just dealing with idiots and whatnot. Well, of course, I had a lot of people asking what was wrong, why it was taking so long, and, of course, why I always felt the need to complain! (LMAO at that last one!) So, after the day from hell that we went through, I’d thought I’d write about it so some of the more ignorant people could get yet another look into the daily routines, and more importantly the complete bullshit that we have to put up with sometimes.

I was booked for a girl-girl scene a couple weeks ago by this production company that shoots for a network of Pay-Per-View channels (I didn’t know that until I did my research AFTER my shoot today). I personally had never heard of them, but my agent is not a scum bag and doesn’t send me out on bullshit shoots. Plus, I knew my costar, so I knew I was in good hands. I got my shoot information last night which said we’d be shooting off of Wilshire Blvd. in Beverly Hills. I knew that there’d be traffic, especially since call time was 9am, so I got to bed early and got up extra early so I could fight traffic. I’m NEVER late for anything… I always plan ahead.

One thing that irked me a little, which is becoming more and more common these days, is that my production sheet had said that I was to come hair and makeup ready. Personally, I can’t stand this. (I know that the economy is bad, but we’re ALL struggling.) In my personal opinion, we work in an industry that sells girls and sex… HOT girls! I don’t understand how a company can skimp on something like MAKEUP when they’re selling the girls’ images! It seems essential to me. So, usually, when I’m asked to come hair and makeup ready, my rate increases $100 so that I can pay a makeup artist to come make me look beautiful. (To top if off, they actually described to me how they wanted me to do my makeup. I’m sorry, in my opinion, if you want my makeup done a certain way, then pay someone to come do it… I’ll do my makeup however I want! lol.) However, I was so tired last night that I just didn’t feel like making a phone call to handle the makeup situatino, so I let it be and got up early to do it myself.

I should also take this opportunity to point out that this company begged my agent and I for a lower rate for the girl-girl scene. I’ll admit, I have a high rate, but if it’s going to be an easy day, I usually don’t mind dropping it. So, the scene was booked for $200 lower than my usual rate. Not a big deal. But, for what they were saving on my rate (and Abbey’s as well!), they should’ve at least provided makeup. Just my opinion.

So anyway, I have a 9am call time… I was on set in this house at 8:50. (As I said… I’m never late!) So, I grabbed a seat and waited… And waited… And waited… Finally Abbey gets there at about 9:20. Still no crew. Wait… Aren’t THEY the ones that set up the 9am call time??? If THEY can’t be there at 9am, why do I have to be? It’s just so unprofessional! I had texted my agent and told him that if they didn’t show up by 9:30, I was going to leave. Well, the crew walked in minutes before 9:30. Honestly, the exact words out of my mouth: “So nice of you to FINALLY show up!” Rude, I know… But even more rude of them!

Whatever… We get going with paperwork, IDs, picking out outfits, etc. As Abbey and I were getting dressed, we overheard the crew talk about 6 locations in the house they wanted to shoot. We looked at each other funny. Then they started saying, “We’ll shoot one tease here… then one here… then another one there…” Abbey and I met in the bathroom and starting chatting. We were confused. Exactly how many teases were we shooting??? Typically, a scene consists of a set of ‘pretty girls’ (pics of just the girl, slowly stripping out of whatever outfit she’s wearing for the scene), a set of sex stills, a tease and/or scene intro, and the actual scene, usually ranging from 20-35 minutes. So, for them to be talking about multiple teases, we were confused. I told Abbey that we could shoot these first two since that was obviously part of the scene and what we’re being paid for. Then, if anything comes up after that, we’ll chat, because we were not getting paid to shoot anything more.

So, I shoot my first little tease. I slowly stripped out of my pink lingerie, caressed my body and whatnot. They shot 12 minutes of just that. Then, they shot a little of me and Abbey together, mainly just giving sultry and playful looks. Then, they shot Abbey’s tease. In the mean time, I had texted my agent about the confusion and he completely agreed with Abbey and I and that we were not getting paid for multiple sets.

After shooting the tease with Abbey, the director then starts talking about what else we’re shooting that day. He starts saying that we’re going to shoot a couple more teases, do individual interviews, then an interview together in which we were supposed to ‘play’ with each other, then he was going to shoot a solo video with each of us, then we’d shoot the girl-girl scene. Whoa?! What?! So, in our heads, we’re thinking, “Okay, these guys want a girl-girl scene with teases (1 scene, which is fine), a solo scene of each of us with teases (2 scenes from each of us total now, 3 all together), and an interview type thing where we’re supposed to get down and dirty, too (4 scenes all together)… and we’re each getting paid $200 UNDER our normal lesbian scene rates??? HELL NO!!!”

Abbey and I remained calm and explained that we weren’t going to shoot anything more than what was needed for ONE GIRL-GIRL scene because that’s all we were being paid for. The director in turn, proceeds to say, “Well, I told your agent what were were doing today and that you’d be here all day. And, I’m paying you each $____ so I have you for the whole day and you have to shoot whatever I need!” Abbey and I FLIPPED, understandably. Our rates are, obviously, per SCENE and is, basically, for one day. Meaning, you have a whole day to shoot this ONE SCENE. It doesn’t mean that you pay us for one day and shoot as much as you want, which he was telling us. He went on to say something like, “Well, you’re booked for a girl-girl scene, so, as long as I don’t make you do more than that, we can shoot whatever we want and that includes solos!”

My response: “So, if you booked me for a boy-girl scene, you’d think it’s okay to shoot a bunch of girl-girl scenes and not pay me for them because it’s ‘not more than’ a boy-girl scene?” To my surprise, his response was a YES!

For those who might be a little lost still, pornstars have a rate for EVERY KIND of scene: HJs, BJs, Solos, Girl-Girl, Boy-Girl, Anal, DP, Softcore, Photosets, Dialogue Days, Etc. So, if this company wanted a girl-girl scene AND solo scenes from each of us, they needed to pay for the girl-girl scene (possibly two with whatever the interview thing was) AND the solo scenes.

This director just did not see the problem. He called our agent, we called our agent (who, by the way, was just told it was a girl-girl scene and he knew NOTHING about everything else), and what it came down to was that Abbey and I would do the girl-girl scene NOW since we had already shot the teases and that was it! If he wanted solos, he’d have to pay us more. (We actually did end up shooting some interview-type stuff and using that as the scene intro, but we refused to do more than ONE KISS! lol.) This director was PISSED! He kept going on about how no other girl he has ever shot has complained about the situation and things like that. Of course, I threw it in his face: “Well, you’ve never shot me or Abbey before and you can’t compare all of the girls like that! Maybe no other girl was strong enough to say NO or maybe she didn’t realize that you were fucking her out of money.” (Yeah, it’s actually quite common!) I mean, aside from not paying our regular rates, this guy had planned to have us on set from 9am to, as he said, 6 or 7pm (9-10 HOURS for a girl-girl scene when we already come makeup ready?!?!?! I don’t think so! Something like that should take 3, maybe 4 hours TOPS!), shoot basically 4 scenes and only pay us a cheap rate for one, blah blah blah. Ask any PORNSTAR (not a newbie)… That’s a 4-figure day right there… Not even worth the newcomer-girl-girl rate that we were being paid!

So, we ended up doing the scene and, although the director was PISSED, Abbey and I put on a happy face and had a positive attitude the rest of the day. (Although, about 5 minutes into the scene, Abbey and I were enjoying ourselves and being loud, kind of dominating and demanding, and just doing what we each liked in a lesbo scene… and we were told to ‘tone it down’! WTF? LMAO!!! Whatever, dude.) We still didn’t get out of there until 4:00! 7 hours (well, 6 1/2 since the crew was late!) to shoot a BORING lesbian scene??? Wow!

Frankly, after that jackass went off on me and Abbey like that today and tried to tell us that we basically had to do whatever he wanted because he ‘has us for the day’, I couldn’t care less about pissing him off and him never booking me again. Why would I want to work with someone who is obviously disrespectful and is out to screw girls over? What’s my word of the month? Oh yeah… DOUCHEBAG!!!!! lol!

Anyway, my whole beef is that there a A LOT of people in the industry like this. But, to be honestly, about 90% of the girls would do everything that this guy asked, no questions asked. Yet another reason I’m labeled the ‘bitch’ around these parts: because I have the nerve to stand up for myself and say no when I know I’m getting dicked around! Most girls wouldn’t. Either they’d be scared of the director or they just need the money so bad that they don’t care. (I’m not saying I don’t need the money. This is my JOB. Of course I need the money. But, again, this is my JOB, my LIVING… I’m not about to get fucked out of the money I deserve!)

Bullshit like this doesn’t happen EVERYDAY, but it’s also not uncommon. It’s not fair to the girls on either end – the ones getting screwed and the ones being labeled the bitch for standing up. People think that porn is so easy and you go in, fuck, and go home. It’s a BUSINESS, like anything else. Sadly, a lot of people don’t treat it like a business as they should. We’re all out to get paid… I just don’t want to be a little pushover while doing it. I’ve said it so many times and I’ll say it again – If it’s things like this that give me the ‘bitch reputation’, I’ll take it!

****EDIT****

After much debate and requests from several industry PROFESSIONALS, I’ve decided to name names. Frankly, what this crew did was so pathetic, I don’t give a shit anymore.

New Frontier Media/The Erotic Networks – I believe the director’s name was Graham.

I’m definitely very surprised with these people given they are supposed to be a pretty big company! Wow!

About six months ago, I met this guy. Wait… Before I go any further, let me explain how we ‘met’… LOL!

So, I’m traveling with my friend Lynda. I’m up in the hotel room and she’s in the lobby talking to the front desk. This guy, ‘Art’, approaches her. “Hey, you’re Jayden’s friend, right?” 

“Ummm… Yeah…”

“Oh, hi! I’m Art… I’m a friend of *****’s…” Blah, blah, blah…

So, Lynda gets back to the room and starts telling me that she met my friend Art. I’m looking at her funny and I finally speak up: “Who’s Art?”

“He says he knows you. He’s one of *****’s friends. He approached me in the lobby….”

Anyway, we get to talking a little and I have absolutely no idea who this guy is, but apparently we have some of the same friends. But how the hell did he know who Lynda was? He’s never met me, let alone my friend, and how did he know she was with me there? Weird!

So, we attend the event that we’re there to attend and, what do you know? He has the seats right next to us! Geez! He introduced himself to me and whatnot (Yeah, I had never met him before, just to confirm it.), and then he continues to talk throughout the entire event. Seriously, he never shut up! He was one of those name dropper kind of people! “I know this person and that person, and I got the hookups with this company and that club…” He even went as far as to bring up my work (which, I hadn’t mentioned… He knew!) and told me and my friend about a makeup artist that he ‘hooks up’ with. (It just so happened that we both know that makeup artist and he didn’t have a chance in hell with her! And she later confirmed that he NEVER happened! lol.) I mean, the guy would just not shut about about how cool he thought he was! OH MY GOD! (It wasn’t until dinner the next night with everyone MINUS HIM that my friend and I were filled in: He’s one of those ‘friends’ that is really irritating and always mooching off everyone and people are nice to him because he’s really never done anything wrong but still everyone talks shit behind his back. You know the kind! lol.) So, before this event is even over, Art keeps trying to get Lynda and I to leave with him and head to the after party. Ummm… NO! I told him we had a car waiting for us and we’re going with the official sponsors of the event. (And he thought HE had the hookups… Ha! That shut him up pretty quick!)

Oh, it also turns out that homeboy didn’t have quite the hookups that he thought he did because he sure had a hell of a time trying to get into our VIP section at the club… Even though he was ‘best friends’ with all everyone there!

Moving on… I got a text about an hour ago… Something like, “I was approached by one of *****’s friends and he asked if I banged you.” Mind you, my friend that sent me this text is over on the East coast right now and we all live in California. So that’s just weird. Then, I get a little more info and I guess he asked straight asked my friend if he fucked me in this particular city that we were all in that night! WOW!!! Who actually asks a question like that??? That can’t possibly be a normal thing that one guy asks another guy that he doesn’t really know, can it? I mean, that’s just RUDE! And I think about it a little, and the guy’s just a fucking douche bag, that’s clear! But to me, all I’m thinking is: This guys knows I’m a porn star, so he probably just assumes that I would’ve fucked him anyway. Plus, since I’m a porn star, it’s okay to asks things like that since I’m just a whore and I don’t have any feelings anyway, right? It’s not like I’m a real person or anything anyway, right? Honestly, if I were just another girl with a ‘normal’ job (as according to society standards), a question like that would’ve never been asked under such circumstances. It’s one thing for close FRIENDS to say something like, “Dude, I saw you left the bar with that hot blonde last night… So, did you bang her?” But you don’t ask someone that you don’t know if he fucked a porn stat that you also don’t know. (I feel like I’m rambling… Did that make sense???)

I would’ve LOVED to have been there and fucking punched him! (Of course, given the event/circumstances, my friend couldn’t… DAMNIT! lol.)

Anyway, the whole purpose to be blabbing on and on right now was just because I’m irritated. (Damn mother nature! lol.) But honestly, I think that a lot of brainless people, like this guy, think like this. I mean, y’all wouldn’t believe the amount of fucking RETARDED questions that I get on a daily basis (as I’m sure a lot of porn girls do): How many times a day do you have sex? How many times a day do you finger yourself? How many guys have you fucked in one day? Have you ever gone a day without fucking someone? I have an eight inch cock… Wanna come fuck me?

Are you fucking kidding me??? Yeah, I’m this big fucking whore running naked up and down Ventura Blvd. in broad daylight looking for guys to screw because I just can’t get enough dick!

Seriously?!?!?! I know I have a pretty good sized following, and people that actually read my blogs and pay attention know me and know that I’m the complete polar opposite. I have a JOB, like everyone else. I go, I do it, I get paid, and I want to go home and get on with my life. I’m single, yes, but I’m not easy. I don’t go to bars looking for a hookup. The only sex I ever have is on camera. I don’t sleep with someone unless I really know them and really like them. Again, it’s just a fucking job… It has absolutely no reflection on who I am as a person… Get over it!

I do know that it takes a certain kind of person (a ‘different’ kind of person) to be able to do what I (what WE) do. It really does. It takes a STRONG person to be able to separate yourself like that and be able to draw a line between the two. And this is where the good get separated from the bad (the crackhead whores, as most like to say). I’ve managed to keep my two lives separate and live a pretty “normal” life outside of work… That is, until douche bags start asking dumbass questions like the aforementioned!

I know it’s never going to be a successful measure, but I’d love if the entire world just opened their eyes, their minds and their hearts and could accept ‘different’ people and treat them like ‘regular/normal’ people. We all have minds, hearts, feelings, and souls on the inside… Show a little bit of respect!

*A side note on why I think I flipped out a little over this guy Art: I really like this ‘friend’ of mine. And I mean I REALLY like him. And it’s a fucking stupid comment like that that I think would make my friend second guess me and what he could be possibly getting himself into a little. I don’t want that nor do I need that in my life as I’m sure he doesn’t want/need that in his life.